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avatar ParkRevolutionary634 26 day.ago

Where do generals keep their armies?

In their sleevies.

dadjoke

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. My dad recently welcomed my son into a prestigious club he's the president of.

He was grandfathered in.

2. A frog walks into a bank to get a loan

The frog goes up to the teller and see's the nametag on the counter says Whack. Frog: "Hi Mrs. Whack, I'd like to get a loan". Teller: "Sure we can do that, just need to know a few things, first what's your name?" Frog: "Kermit" Teller: "You're not Kermit the frog" Frog: "No, I get that a lot. I'm named after him, but my name is Kermit Jagger, Mick Jagger is my dad, and my mom is Kermit's cousin." Teller: "What collateral do you have?" The frog pulls out a small porcelain elephant and hand it to her. Teller: "I don't know about this, I'll have to check with the bank manager" The teller goes to the bank managers office and knocks on the door. Manager: "Yes Patty" Teller: "I've got this From, Kermit Jagger who is looking to get a loan, and he says he can use this for collateral. Any idea what it is and if we can use it?" Manager: "Let me see this. Ahh yes. This is a nick knack Patty Whack, give the frog a loan, his old man is a rolling stone"

3. What is smaller than USA?

USB.

4. A man came home from work early on a Friday afternoon to find his wife and two of her attractive friends chatting in the living room. His wife smiled and said, “We were just talking about having a foursome if you're up for it.”

The man went into the bedroom and came back two minutes later with his junk in his hand. The women all had golf clubs in theirs.

5. I told a joke during a Teams call, but no one laughed.

Turns out I'm not even remotely funny.

6. What do you call a large man in a physiotherapy session?

Andre the Client

7. I recently cut ties with someone dragging me down

Mountain climbing with family can be hard

8. Real Life Dad Joke: “Daddy, where does toilet paper come from?”

Toiletries.

9. Puns makes me numb

Mathematical puns makes me number

10. Has anyone actually witnessed someone's life being saved using snake venom?

Or are these cases purely antidotal?

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